The Office
"I am BeyoncĂ©, always." — Michael Scott
"Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way." — Michael Scott
"The worst thing about prison was the dementors." — Prison Mike
"I'm not superstitious, but I'm a little stitious." — Michael Scott
"I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do." — Michael Scott
"I'm always thinking one step ahead like a carpenter that makes stairs." — Andy Bernard
Parks & Recreation
"If there were more food and fewer people, this would be a perfect party." — Ron Swanson
"Treat yo self" — Donna Meagle
"I am big enough to admit that I am often inspired by myself." — Leslie Knope
"Sometimes you gotta work a little, so you can ball a lot." — Tom Haverford
"I have no idea what I'm doing, but I know I'm doing it really, really well." — Andy Dwyer
"I stand behind my decision to avoid salad and other disgusting things." — Leslie Knope
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt
"I'm pretty but tough, like a diamond. Or beef jerky in a ball gown." — Titus Andromedon
"We're different. We're the strong ones and you can't break us." — Kimmy Schmidt
"But I already did something today!" — Titus Andromedon
"I'm a flamingo because I'm delicate, colorful, and often stand on one leg due to a planter's wart." — Titus Andromedon
"I envy you. I've never been able to meet me." — Titus Andromedon
"I'll have a water, two sugars." — Titus Andromedon
"Don't answer that door until I lose 15 pounds." — Titus Andromedon
"I thought burpees were just baby burps." — Titus Andromedon
Gossip Girl
"Have a little faith, and if that doesn't work, have a lot of mimosas." — Blair Waldorf
"Whoever said that money doesn't buy happiness didn't know where to shop." — Blair Waldorf
"You can't make people love you, but you can make them fear you." — Blair Waldorf
"I don't need friends, I need more champagne." — Blair Waldorf
"What I want is to become a powerful woman." — Blair Waldorf
"I'd ask you how you are but I don't really care." — Serena van der Woodsen
Riverdale
"I don't follow rules, I make them. And when necessary, I break them." — Veronica Lodge
"In case you haven't noticed, I'm weird. I'm a weirdo." — Jughead Jones
"I'm in the mood for chaos." — Cheryl Blossom
"You can't go through life trying not to get hurt." — Archie Andrews
Gilmore Girls
"If eating cake is wrong, I don't want to be right." — Lorelai Gilmore
"I find nothing exciting before 11:00 AM." — Rory Gilmore
"I don't like Mondays but unfortunately they come around eventually." — Lorelai Gilmore
"People are particularly stupid today. I can't talk to any more of them." — Michel Gerard
"I don't know what anything means anymore. I mean I can't even read my own handwriting." — Paris Gellar
"I wanna be good, life's just not letting me." — Jess Mariano